No longer on blogger.com, saur.  
http://product-of-wandering.tumblr.com/
Hopefully you'll be joining me there.

Oh my, this lipstick color is definitely number one on my Christmas list.

Oh Brother,

Today my brother texted me asking, "Do you think Mom would be mad if I got another tattoo?" I responded telling him that I don't think she would mind as long as he told her before and didn't go behind her back to it {again}. Then he said, "well I already got it..."
.......

I need some change. I thought that by cutting sixteen inches of my hair off would possibly and probably satisfy my desire for change, but I'm still a'seekin'. I was talking about this the other day with my friend Jordan, and we came to conclusion that we want change because we want to start fresh. Clean slate?

The reason that I'm so obsessed with these stars and nebulas is because my Creator made them. I also, was designed by this omniscient God that I talk about all the time. Look at all of these amazing, intricate solar designs and then at me, the "flawed" human. I'm loved more than the universe. Nothing baffles me more.

And another thought; I referred to myself as flawed. I know that I am not flawed. Sometimes I just convince myself that I am. But I'm not, and neither are you.

All of my life, In every season, You are still God.

Right now, I will make the choice to go watch this past Saturday's episode of Saturday Night Live instead of working on the essay that I have due in first period tomorrow.

"Safety is not found in the absence of danger, but in the presence of God."

Oh my, I hate when people call me Jil.

Procrastination is the name of the game.

It's not until nine o'clock when I start to regret going to the beach instead of doing the essay that I was assigned today, due tomorrow. I have not learned my lesson though, and plan on seeing more of this in the future.

If I weren't allergic to bees, bee keeping would be a definite possible career choice of mine. Maybe just for a little, I think it'd be interesting. Just the minor setback that's keeping me from pursuing this one.

II

I

Summer

doesn't 

end.

"When people's steps follow the Lord, 

God is pleased with their ways. 
If they stumble, they will not fall,
 because the Lord holds their hand."

Psalm 37:24-25

My mistakes are just reminders as to why God is God, and I am not.

mmm things like this, most definitely my favorite thing to ponder.

Aurora

I went to a fundraising dinner the other night with my mom for a lady who runs an orphanage in Kenya who's dying of cancer. The lady who organized the dinner was talking to me about my trip to Ecuador and repeatedly said, "I'm so amazed by the ways that God broke you through your experience" and kept insisting that I'm a broken person now because of it. I got pretty irritated by her because who wants to be told that they're a broken person? I guess she's right in the sense that an experience like that sort of leaves you an open wound to the world.

So thrilled by this video.

But Jesus spoke to them at once. "Don't be afraid,"

 he said. "Take courage. 

I am here!"

Matthew 14:27

Before I left for Ecuador I googled all of the places that we were going just to get a better image of where we were going to be and such. I googled "Shandia, Ecuador" and pictures of kids came up, which then, didn't have that much significance. Missing Ecuador, I googled it again this morning and the same pictures came up. Those kids are the same ones that my team and I lived with for a week and fell in love with. The thing that breaks my heart is that they are wearing the same clothes that they wore everyday when I was there in those pictures that were taken in 2008.

You, my friend and reader, I hope you're having a lovely day. It's a lovely day to have.

Mornin' spiderwebs.

I think that vocabulary determines to what extent you're able to express yourself.  I can't wait until one day I find someone who loves vocabulary just as much as I do, then we could be entertained simply by conversation for mass amounts of time.

You are holy, great and mighty. The moon and the stars, declare who you are. I’m so unworthy, but still you love me. Forever my heart will sing of how great you are.

Love does not

keep a record of wrongs.  If God doesn't even remember my sins, the least I can do is make an effort to move on from them myself.

It's a broken Hallelujah

O Praise Him!

When God believes in you, your situation is never hopeless. When He walks with you, you are never alone. When God is on your side, you can never, ever lose. So don't be afraid of tomorrow-
God is already there. 

--Barbara Johnson

12:49 pm, May 15, 2010

"When God looks at you, He smiles." 

This was the last thing my grandma said to me, I put it in the notepad in my phone because I wasn't sure when the last time I would see her would be and I knew I would want to remember these kinds of things. I'm glad that I did. 

Thinking future

One thing I find myself thinking more and more about is my future home. I would like a cozy little apartment with cement floors, floral wallpapers, and a raw ceiling with pipes. I want an antique styled bed frame with vintage end tables where my lamps can sit. There will be white wooden bookshelves and french doors. Oh, the kitchen.  The kitchen will be spacious and comfortable with sea-foam green cabinets and always decorated with fresh flowers. I think the main thing that I'm looking forward to is living alone. Check up with me in ten years and see if this dream has become reality yet. I should find a setting for this house of mine to make its home.

You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.

Song of Solomon 4:7

Lovely Night

Went to Koffee Klatch for tea with Jenna Pryor tonight and walked around Laguna for a little while.

 Nights like these remind me how lucky I am to live where I live with the kind of friends that I have. Then we came back to my house to find Jessica Walker, Brittany Zwick, & Monica Castorena in my living room watching Zombie Land. What a great night, I'd live it twice.

Footprints in the Sand. By Mary Stevenson

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my lifethere have only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?”

The Lord replied,
“The times when you have seen only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I carried you.”

I got to attend the most beautiful, simple wedding today for a lovely lady named Kate JOHNSON. I'm not sure where I'm going with this blog post, but I felt like the event deserved some cyber recognition.

{Holla Jen McQuade! You just might be one of the most beautiful people I know, most definitely.}

"Hope is the thing with feathers, that perches in the soul. And sings the tune without words and never stops at all."

Blissful Listenin': Volume II

http://www.brokenbells.com

Went on a hike today through Laguna Canyon. HOT. Reaching the top is always the best feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction.

So classic. So wonderful.

First off,

I'm pretty sure today is the most beautiful summer day that we've had so far this year.

Second, 

"I have made you pure, but not by fire, as silver is made pure. I have purified you by giving you troubles."

Isaiah 48:10

In January I started sending a Bible verse in the morning to two of my friends who were struggling with different situations in their lives. Within two or three months there were over fifty people who I sent the verses to. If you're one of those people, you're the reason behind this blog post. By about month five, I was starting to feel like it was a responsibility. In turn, making me feel like reading my Bible was a chore. So if you were wondering if I was just getting lazy and not sending them, there's the real reason. However, today I sat down to read a little bit in Isaiah and came across Isaiah 48:10 and loved it, so I sent it. There is a reason for every obstacle that we encounter. God is purifying us through them.

Jealousy.

Yes it's human nature, and I'm very much guilty of it, but I don't understand the technicality of it. I don't understand how no matter how much we can try to think something positive about ourselves, we have a way of unconsciously convincing ourselves that it's not quite true.

How great is our God

I'm missing Ecuador.

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength. 

Isaiah 30:15

“Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.” --C.S.Lewis


Faith is the confident belief or trust in the truth or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.
(Via Wikipedia)


FAITH: The trust in God and in His promises as made through Christ and the Scriptures by which humans are justified or saved.

Trust in the Lord forever,
 for in the Lord God you have an everlasting rock.

Isaiah 26: 3-4

Faith is knowing that God will take care of you, no matter what.

La Basílica del Voto Nacional Via Mini Diana

Jenna Pryor

wanted a shout out. She gets a shout out! Weo!

I call her Mom, because she takes care of me.
She's one heck of a person. I love her. 

Want to know a responsibility that I hate having? Cell phones. I hate having to always have something on you in order to stay updated or informed. Having just come back from a third world country with no phones or internet access, I find it difficult to come back to this lifestyle that we're so accustomed to in Orange County. Cell phones are just one of the many things that I'm having trouble returning home to.

I miss this place.

& I miss this face.

If you really knew me you'd know..

..how much I wish I could accept myself the way that I am. I always think that I could be funnier or I could be better looking or nicer and I don't give myself any credit for being the way that I am. One pathetic example; I always thought that I wasn't pretty enough. {I say this in the past tense because it's easier to say that I did feel this way rather than saying that I still do feel this way}. So I decided to grow my hair out because I thought that if I had pretty hair, then I would get closer to accepting the way that I look. A while ago I realized that YES, there should be one thing that makes you feel better about yourself. Another thing that I realized is that one thing should not be your hair, or anything else that we as humans materialistically possess for that matter. Now that I've cut sixteen inches of hair off of my head, I finally find comfort in the thought that God has created me exactly how he intended me to be.

The Lord will fight for you;
you need only to be still.

Exodus 14:14

The Sweet Hurt - Where Would You Go? [Live Performance] from The Mighty Fifty on Vimeo.

Lesson Learned

Second day: Already irritated by people.

I responded by beating myself up inside about why I let the little things that people do bug me. I was talking to one wise fella who told me that I needed to have more grace on myself. So often I think I get caught up in trying to show grace and love to the people around me and just let everything that's bugging me sit on the back burner. I realized during my experience these past two weeks that not only do I need to be gracious and loving towards others, but I need to do the same for myself. The problem isn't solved just because I've recognized it, that's still a work in progress. We're fragile people, God treats us accordingly, why don't we treat ourselves this way?

Ecuador,

I'll see you {so so so so} soon!

Sincerely, Jilian.

Who: My favorite people on Earth

What: Mission trip

Where: Ecuador

When: Tomorrow

Why: God wants us to.

My feelings towards all of this? Awesome, can't wait.

Little Bit 'a Wisdom

Two and a half months ago my grandma died, on my birthday nonetheless. I couldn't tell you why, but I felt really ashamed to grieve about it. I felt like I needed to force myself to find joy out of the whole situation. Talking to a friend the next day, I apologized to him for being "out of it" because I felt bad that I wasn't able to put on a happy front. I was expecting an, "Oh it's fine, don't worry about it" or maybe, "I understand". He responded with "Jesus wept too." I couldn't imagine a better response. Comforting beyond my vocabulary.

Marissa Galvez, I've been unfair.

Meet Jilian.

God's Composition

I love them.

Wednesday Night Baking!

& then this happened.

pizza sauce?

So yesterday one of my friends and I were sitting in her kitchen talking about the things that high school kids do for fun. She brought up a point; that most of these things aren't by the world's standards, "good". Kind of a disappointing realization, yeah? At least for some of us. Remember when we were seven and the summers seemed like they would never end and pretty much anything would entertain us for hours? I'd love to be seven again.

p.s. This will entertain you for hours. 

AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com

The color palette God chose when He created the world amazes me. 

I am thankful for color.

You know that "I'm confused and irritable because I just woke up from a four hour nap on a way-too-humid summer day" mood? I know all about that mood. Just sayin'.

Sometimes I get  frustrated that I don't know exactly where I'm going and how i'll end up in life. I don't think I'm the only one that feels this way either, but as long as we know who were following, I think were good to go. Wherever that may be. Thats my tidbit for the day.

Just some blissful listenin'.

http://stream.bandofhorses.com/

________ is God's original masterpiece.

The heavens declare the glory of God;
the skies proclaim the work of His hands.

Psalm 19:1

God,

You really go above and beyond. Thank you.

A Meaningful Inheritance

Great Grandma's Bible {top, 1896}

Grandma's Bible {bottom, 1932}